One of the reason why I am very fond of blogging is because I am afraid of being forgotten. I always end up writing the things that has happened in my life so that if I’ll die, I have something for someone to remember or read about me. This is how I value my soul. It is the ultimate gift that God has given me. It does not matter how many people will read my letters, how many people will see my art, how many people I’ve inspired, as long as I can leave a mark in this world. I am afraid of oblivion. I guess most of the people here on Earth are afraid of the complete death. The complete nothingness. Why do Catholics believe in the after death? Why do Hindus believe about reincarnation? Because they cannot think about being forgotten, passing out, and totally be nothing. There is huge possibility that the complete nothingness is real. What if we die and die completely?
I now know what death is all about. It is about acceptance. Accepting things that cannot be changed. Being temporary. We are just given a maximum of 100 years or another 20 if we’ll be lucky here on Earth. No one really knows what is out there. People are afraid of death, the oblivion. People cannot accept being forgotten, that’s why they believe in the after death. They believe that there is another life after living in flesh. A sanctuary which we believe we can achieve by being good, doing good and trying to be good here on Earth. We follow rules from different religions, norms, culture or traditions because that is what we were being told- being righteous or immoral. As people grow from what they believe, they become fools and neglect other ideas- other fools’ ideas and then tragedy will arise.
I have nothing against people with deep faith – like a tunnel of faith, that is a trait which I believe would pursue the better life. However, there are those who have been blind folded and being narrow-minded with beliefs I know I would not understand. People with strong religious roots have been close minded because they believed they’ve achieved the fullness of their spirit and then they’ve closed their doors from the world’s vast ideas of spirituality. That is the peak when they judge other people, thinking that the only way to survive is being truly walking with them on Earth.
We are just a dust in the wind. A pebble on the beach. A piece of match inside a box who thinks to reach the sky to become a star in the universe…but we’re not. We are just humans. We just have to take this opportunity and feel blessed to experience being pained, angry, depressed, helpless, confused and afraid but never forget that without these negative feelings, we won’t be able to tell that we are happy, we feel good, we feel fascinated, inspired, love and be loved.
P.S. Thoughts from John Green’s Looking for Alaska